Battle lost

Well, I lost the battle with emotional eating on Thursday. It continued on to Friday. I had previously planned to splurge all weekend being my husband's birthday today so things are OK.

I will get right back on track tomorrow. Hopefully I can keep the emotions in check and not eat my way through them.

Still at It

Still at Clean Eating. No emotional binges, although I have thought about it, I have remained binge free.

This weekend will be at a loss...it's Michael's birthday weekend. There will be plates of pasta and ice cream cake, burgers and fries, and a Brazilian feast. That's OK. I will eat small portions and enjoy.

Very tired again this week. Have not successfully gotten up to go to the gym...not once. I guess it will be another Firm workout here at home tonight. I wish it were easier to get up at 3:30 am...

Blah..

Clean eating is going well. I am doing a rather fine job of adapting it to real life, I think anyway. lol

The first week of eating clean I felt...happy. I felt as if I finally got my emotions in check. However, today I'm not so sure. I'm not even sure why I'm doing this, not like it will even matter. Is there really a reason for my existence? Will I really spend the rest of my pathetic life searching for purpose????

Blah.

Ok...I gotta Move My body...

Ok...still doing well on the clean eating front. Ignored a craving for Pad Thai and have learned to enjoy my black coffee.

One thing that bothers me is that I have been sooooo exhausted, drained... I went to the gym on Monday morning and nearly fell asleep on the way, had to cut my workout short because I was soooo sleepy. I have not worked out since with the exception of some abdominal work. I am so disappointed in myself. I am so desperately trying not to let the disappointment sink in because I know that my self-loathing behavior will sabotage me and that I cannot do. I just wish that 3:30 am was just a little easier to deal with. lol Another thing I realized is that I am not eating enough veggies. Good Lord, all the fresh veggies will get to be expensive. LOL

Ok...maybe next week will be better???

Still at it, emotions and all..

Ok...Eating Clean...I'm still at it. LOL

The last several days have been very stressful and low and behold, I have not binged and have been able to successfully keep from my favorite past time which is, emotional eating.

Having moved on to Cooler 2 because I felt that Cooler 1 was too restrictive (no nuts etc.) I am now more hungry than I was on Cooler 1. I wonder if the brown rice makes me hungry...I hope it's not the fruit because I'm really enjoying fruit. I was so hungry today that I had to include a Larabar with my dinner...tisk tisk...

I have been working out. Today was my rest day but tomorrow at 3:45 am the alarm will go off , summoning my sleepy drive to the gym.

Ok, I'm tired...I gotta go to bed

Wrapping up Week One, Cooler One

Well, I am just one day away from the completion of Week One, Cooler one of the Eat Clean Diet.
I have done well. No binges unless you count the splurge meal last night.

Wow...I so totally ate terribly last night. I will NEVER do that again.

I made it to the gym most days and that is an accomplishment too. Still dont like 4 am but it is what it is.

Looking forward to moving on to Cooler Two on Monday. I am going to keep my startchy complex carbs low but there will be variety and dairy. :-)

Eating Clean Day Two

Well, today is day two of eating clean. This means I am following the principals of eating and exercising of Tosca Reno, the author of the Eat Clean Diet.

I have food issues. Serious food issues that go all the way back to being put on Weight Watchers in the first grade. One of my most hurtful and prevalent memories is my dad telling me on my 11th birthday that I should not have any cake. My mom made me a chocolate layer cake with sticky white frosting and my dad didn't want me to have any...I have never forgotten this.

So...I have issues. I sneak food. I plan binges. I eat when I'm not hungry and will even eat things I don't like because they're there. This I plan to stop. I want to be healthy and vibrant, of healthy weight, strong and full of energy. I want to run. I don't want to be fat, ugly, tired, or in pain all the time.

I will make these changes.

Yesterday went well. Followed plan very well. Had a lovely walk in the Bosque with the family...ok, just Cheyenne really as Michael ran and we walked but it was gorgeous nonetheless.

Ok...gotta get some house cleaning done.